I was speaking with a friend of mine. Talking about what has been going on with me in the last 8 months. She had a great idea that I should blog about this. So I thought why not! I do not know what journey God has you on; but be assured He will have you on one if you are not already. And there is always growth that happens when we trust Him even when things do not make sense.

For me this is the recent journey God has me on.

 Last February I had my annual bought with bronchitis. It turned into pneumonia and I was quite sick. Even when I was frankly a bit scared as I could not breath or barely get out of bed; I knew God was doing something. In the midst of that sickness God started really speaking to my heart. At church we were doing the "Experiencing God" bible study (great study!). The study really is a great reminder to us that God is always at work; He just asks us to join Him where He is already working. I had a few nights where I just could not sleep. I had such a heavy burden to pray for my Dr. She had been such a blessing to me at that time. God had just laid her on my heart and asked me to pray. So I did. He also asked me to pray for my wonderful nurses. One night before an appointment back in March; I really felt like God was wanting me to write a thank you note to my Dr. And tell her what a blessing she has been. And to give her some cds (I am very passionate about Christian music). And I felt like God wanted me to do the same for my nurse at that time. Honestly...I was a little fearful at "what would the reaction be?"; "what are they going to think?". But I knew I had to do that. I wrote my notes. Gathered the cds and went to my appointment. When I spoke to my Dr; she was so thankful. That is when we discovered we were both Christians. For me; what a great moment that God reminded me "Weez; you are not alone. I have provided a Dr who is seeking me..yes; you are not alone". We had a great conversation. I then was able to talk to my nurse. Say thank you to her. I realized---thank you God I was able to be obedient! What a blessing that day was for me!

It was a strange night that night. My breathing was very labored.  I remember feeling God speaking to my heart "It is about to get dark; but trust me". The next day I was in the hospital. I was nervous but I had remembered hearing that in my heart. So I thought there must be a reason God has me here. Of course the reason was to get me breathing better again! With the help of all the team; I was. Some answers came. A chronic breathing problem had been discovered. We just never knew about it. It is called Bronchiactesis. On a humorous note; because of this condition that was happening; I would get 3 words out and my oxygen would cut off. We started calling me "Christopher Walken". Hey; anything for a good laugh at a stressful time; is good by me!
What I am sharing you is more about what God has been doing and less about the very treatable health condition. I had some opportunities to share God's love with my wonderful team of nurses at the hospital. I started to realize; if I let God use this; He can. I started to pray; God use me. Use this for Your Glory. I remember telling my Dr in excitement "I get it! God has asked me to join Him where He is already working! and HE has been using you!". That was a cool "God moment!". That moment when you get a little picture of what God is doing.

So many night I felt like God was speaking to my heart unlike anything before. My prayer life was growing. I was praying for so many different people. I felt stronger spiritually then I had in a long time! I had a new saying "prayin as I am layin".

There have been many nights that breathing has been hard. Answers seems few and far between. I would do my breathing treatments and just listen to worship to focus on Him. When I have not been able to sleep--worship. I had such joy one day bringing in  stack of my favorite cds to the nurses and some of the staff. In case you are wondering; the cds I gave: Bellarive; Meredith Andrews Worth It All; For King & Country.

Here's a thought...God can use us as a light anywhere anyitme we are willing to be a light. I have to ask myself am I willing to be a light? His light? Am I willing to be a "medical missionary"? Pray for those Drs and nurses that He has placed in charge of my care? Yes and Yes. Now that makes this journey all a little more exciting. I tell myself that at the times I am so discouraged as physically I feel like half the person I used to be.

After March--I must have done too much. At that time I had pleurisy (painful infection if lining of the lungs). I was on bed rest for about 2 weeks. May came; my breathing was terrible! Thankful for sessions with a speech therapist to help me to breathe correct again (still getting there). I would start to feel better; then wam! Back down again. Exhaustion - well has become a familiar friend.
My Dr had given me a verse one day as I had asked her if she would pray. I have been standing on this: 2 Corinthians 12:9 "...My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness". I am so thankful she shared that with me. I have been trying to remember that everyday.

In and out of my Dr office; Pulmonary office; ENT office. To a voice specialist. All to help put Humpty Dumpty back together again:)
My amazing church had asked me to share my Story back in July. Via video. About my waiting on God. Well I have become familiar with waiting on Him so why not? I shared that story in August thinking I am on the end of this!
Only to get sick with bronchitis the next week. Knocked me down for a good 3 weeks. As soon as I got back up...I was hit again...still working on healing out of that one.
Yet I know God is in control.
Monday was a hard day...I got the news from my Dr that she wants me to take a leave of absence from everything. Pulmonary wants that too. But why? What is going on? All they can say is it can take a year to heal from this. I fought with her (in a civilized manner of course!). I know I have to do it. I love being on the air; Love my job. But I have to cut down. I have to REST IN HIM. I came home from that appointment and just cried....listening to worship. Hearing God speak to my heart "trust in me". God spoke this to me Isaiah 40:29 "He gives strength to the weak and increases the power of the weak"

Now we know my heart rate is elevated...so time for a cardiologist...why not add one more specialist to the list:) One more place that just maybe God wants me to go and share His love.
My life is changing. I know God is in control of it all. Its still so hard when things you love to do are stripped away. I know God is wanting me to trust Him. To keep looking to Him. To see He is in control of all of this. There are times when i am in tears thinking "God! All that I love feels like it is going away?"..then I am reminded that I need to rest in Him. I need to heal.
That maybe God is allowing all this to get stripped away as He is working into molding me into something new? Am I going to allow fear to control me? Or am I going to trust in Him. Fear can really stop us in our tracks if we let it. I am SOOO thankful for friends that are constantly pointing me to Him.
He is good and He wants what is the best for us; not what is just good for us. Not what we think we need; but what is Best for us. And I am sure when I am on the other side of this...I will look back in awe of all He has done.
My friend I dont know what journey you are on now; praying for you as you go through your journey. May God provide those loving friends that support you and help you to look up. May He remind you of His loving presence.
Well that is all (which is alot!) for today. Thank you to my friend that said maybe blog about your journey. Thank you for reading.
Here is a link to the video story I shared in my church.
Blessings,
Weez
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9btlbaKF9g